Who are you?
Let me introduce myself. I am Leah, an early-30’s woman who has spent the last, oh I don’t know, four years or more trying to figure it out. Trying to figure what out? I hear you cry. Trying to figure out why I felt like I did, why I acted and behaved in the ways I did, why I wasn’t happy or confident, why I pursued the wrong things and generally speaking, trying to figure out life. I wanted to work out what was going on with my mental health and work on my personal development. I wanted to self-improve and to be the person I knew I could be. I had been feeling awful since I was a teenager and had no idea why. For many years I had no idea that I was depressed, anxious and desperate for help. For the first couple of years of my learning and discovery, I skirted around these issues. I would cover them up for a while but the same thoughts, behaviours and self-sabotage would just rear their heads again and I’d feel deflated and back to square one. I wasn’t honest with myself or my therapists about things, so all I was doing was applying temporary fixes. I was simply febrezing my issues rather than carrying out a deep clean, as it were. (I’m just going to let the ‘Ah, that’s why this is called The Emotion Febrezer!’s settle for a moment. I know, clever, right?)
Why a blog?
I started this blog two years ago for a variety of reasons. It was when I really started to dig deep and really get into the above. I thought a blog would help me figure it out as I went and I find writing it therapeutic. I’ve always enjoyed writing and it’s cleansing for me, as it is for many people, hence why journalling is a thing. I also hoped I may be able to help others. If I could stop even just one person who cast their eye over my blog feel less alone, feel less silly or even more informed than they were before, then I would consider myself a roaring success, which after two years, I do.
So what now?
Well, I hope you’ll have a read and I hope you’ll enjoy it and maybe you’ll learn something new, too. I hope you’ll take what I’ve worked hard to learn over the last few years and have some ‘aha!’ moments for yourself, or pass it on to someone who you think needs a little ‘aha’ moment. I hope you’ll feel understood. Maybe you’ll even be entertained by my use of metaphor and quite probably, embarrassed on my behalf for some of my earlier entries and grammar skills. There’s a page for my recommendations too, so if you’re not interested in what this newly transformed and witty human being has to say, maybe you can just pop there and find a good book or video to watch instead. Either way, thank you for being here and I hope you find what you are looking for. Much love.