A Lesson in Being Yourself

I wrote my last post just before the turn of the new year asking you all to be unequivocally yourselves in 2021. I asked you to embrace the real you and all that weird-ass shit that you do.

On this same path, over this last month I, like many others I suspect, have been watching a lot of TV shows and movies amongst my more productive and creative endeavours that are keeping me sane throughout England’s LD3. For me, my main viewing has been LGBTQ+ heavy. From TV shows, documentaries, English speaking films, French films and Korean films. You name it, I’ve been watching it. My favourite shows celebrate and/or destigmatize the LGBTQ+ community in various ways, from Schitt’s Creek, to Pose, to It’s a Sin (which I can’t talk about without crying) to anything with RuPaul in it.

There is a manner of things that I love about these shows. For me as a predominantly heterosexual woman, for lack of a better term at present, it has also been educational and from these shows I have then sought out areas where my education is lacking, such as the aids epidemic. These particular shows hiring LGBTQ+ actors is spot on. I also love the rawness, the realness, the fabulousness and the massive underlying message throughout them all: Love yourself, just as you are. You are just as worthy as every other human being on this planet. They are about acceptance, love and about breaking down stigmas that shouldn’t be there.

The beauty is that you don’t need to fit in any box or bracket to enjoy these shows or feel the warm glow that emanates from them. In the shows I mentioned above, you fall in love with the characters. You feel what they feel. They are all so beautifully presented to entertain whilst bringing you real situations and running you over emotionally.

It may sound like I have gotten far too emotionally attached to RuPaul’s Drag Race, but it’s not so much as about the entertainment aspect but the real-life it presents to us. Each drag queen has a story of how drag allowed them to be their true selves. Dan Levy said after Schitt’s Creek that his writing of the character Patrick (partner to Dan’s character David) allowed him to see what he deserved in real life. Billy Porter, an actor in Pose, often speaks out on a range of subjects in or around LGBTQ+ and equality. One thing I loved was him talking about what it means to be a man who loves to wear dresses.

At present, we have one side of the world crying their salty, bigot tears because Harry styles wore a dress on the cover of Vogue (and looked snatched by the way). They cry because the LGBTQ+ community, women and BIPOC are daring to point out that perhaps we/they should have a right to, oh, you know, equal rights. With all this going on, it is wonderful to know that in the four walls I am currently spending A LOT of time in, I can sit back and watch the beauty that is people embracing differences, celebrating each other and spreading love. These kinds of shows have been a part of me learning to love myself. For many years I simply felt like I wasn’t graceful enough to be feminine. I felt embarrassed to be feminine as if I couldn’t ‘pull it off’. I tended to sit more heavily in my masculine energy, where I wasn’t happy either. I have now realised there is beauty in both. I am getting better at being the feminine queen I was once too embarrassed to be. I have learnt that who I am is beautiful, no matter where I sit on any spectrum. Femininity is whatever you want it to be. I have a beautiful mix of feminine and masculine energy that I now love and am getting to know better.

That’s what I want more of. I want more shows that show love of all kinds. I want to see everyone represented. I want to see real stories, and real adversity, not to mention the real love stories. The stories that tell us, rightly so, that we are all worthy of love, that we are all fucking phenomenal, and that we should unapologetically love ourselves.

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